ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
