now i know why i became what i already was.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
