If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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