So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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