i just google imaged poop.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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