Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize