you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
ok first of all what the fuck
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
