Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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