i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
