dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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