sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
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