i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
