i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
its liver damage thursday
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
