We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize
