I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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