he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize