I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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