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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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