Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
