BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
