This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
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OPIZZABONMYDICK
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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