that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
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