were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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