Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
