a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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