I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
