i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
