Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
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