Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
