I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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