So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
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