her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
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I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
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I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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