I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Everclear isn't food dammit
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Randomize
