Just mADE A PArabola og urine
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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