Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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