doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
