You can't special order awesome
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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