Swine flu is the new snow day.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
