my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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