One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
