Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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