he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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