break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
