Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
