one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
