Rock
Scissors
Fuck
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
