So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
