Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
