dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I can't turn off my feet"
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Someone signed my nipple.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
