did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
