found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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